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November 1, 2010 :: 12:34pm ET

Movember Greatness

TORONTO, ON -- With the flipping of a the calendar to November comes the grand tradition of men telling their girls that things may get a little hairy for a month.

Movember, as it has become known so affectionately, for those who don’t know, is a month-long sojourn of facial grooming in hopes of raising money and awareness for male specific health concerns.

After all, men are always looking for an excuse to put the razor down for a little while, hence playoff beards, and this gives them a story to tell the lady.

To those members of the fairer sex who don’t appreciate the bristle of the beard, I’m sorry, but be prepared to hear a lot of, “I can’t shave this month, but I’m doing it for a great cause.”

To mark this month-long event, I’ll be looking at the some of the best facial hair in today’s NHL in this week’s article, and maybe even highlight a few looks that will tickle her fancy.

Henrik Zetterberg, Detroit Red Rings
“The Viking”

Many believe that Hank, like Samson and his lochs before him, actually gets his superhuman powers from his finely groomed facial follicles.

Hank’s beard goes through a season long maintenance, normally culminating with a growth during an extended playoff run.

One look at Zetterberg and you are left with no doubt of his Viking heritage. Would you really want to mess with a beard like that? Go-ahead Mr. Zetterberg, take the puck, we all know you’re more of a man than most.

Mike Brown, Toronto Maple Leafs
“The Hulkamaniac”

Sporting a moustache that would make mountain lions purr, Brown is a true throwback to the Wendel Clark era Maple Leafs. So popular has the Cult of Brown grown to become that there is a thread on the Maple Leafs website dedicated to Brown and his legendary whiskers.

Some things in life deserve a slow clap; this legendary duster (the ‘stache, not Brown) is one of them.

George Parros, Anaheim Ducks
“The Yosemite Sam”

What would a list of moustaches that currently grace NHL rinks be without George Parros?

While the Ducks dropped their “mighty” adjective a few years back, one could certainly describe Parros’ soup-strainer as just that.

Parros brought the moustache back to hockey when nobody wanted to touch it, and has firmly planted himself behind only Lanny MacDonald when it comes to famous hockey 'staches. Rumor has it that growing up, George and his brother used to have moustache-growing contests. George, I think you’ve won. By the way, hockey fan, not only is that moustache probably bigger than yours, but it's probably also smarter than yours; it attended Princeton.

Joel Quenneville, Chicago Blackhawks
“The Boss”

Coach Q’s moustache is no nonsense. He keeps it right and keeps it tight. Where Parros and Brown may do it with a level of tongue in cheek humor, Quenneville’s 'stache is strictly business.

While coaching the Blackhawks to the Stanley Cup last season, Quenneville’s moustache helped to guide the ship, giving the players a sense of who was really the boss in the room. Quenneville’s thicket of upper lip foliage also is great for keeping him warm on those cold windy city nights.

Olli Jokinen, Calgary Flames
“The Olli”

Jokinen has been around the NHL in the last couple years, but everywhere he goes a version of his moustache seems to make an appearance. Most recently in his prodigal-son-like return to Calgary, Jokinen’s facial hair has been all that is recognizable of the enigmatic center. He hasn’t been putting up points, and he changed his number; maybe it's time Olli tries to change his luck by ridding himself of the moustache mayhem. Olli, moustache rides aren’t for everybody.

For those readers unable to grow facial hair that measures up to the high standards set by Parros (so basically all of us), here are a couple “weaker” beards that you may draw inspiration from this month:

Jonathan Toews, Chicago Blackhawks
“The Wraparound”

Every April, Toews decides to show off his chops and last year those chops were good enough for a Conn Smythe Trophy. If you’re shy of letting the upper lip run wild, the Toews-inspired mutton chops may just be the facial hair for you. In order to fully complete The Wraparound, be sure to leave some under-chin growth to connect those chops together.

Sidney Crosby, Pittsburgh Penguins
“The I-Wish-My-Beard-Didn’t-Suck”

I have no words to describe this poor excuse of facial hair. None.

 


(Week Ending Sunday, October 31)

Forward of the Week
Joe Thornton, C, San Jose Sharks
2GP, 3G, 5A, 8 Points, +6

Jumbo Joe put up some jumbo numbers in his two games this week, even though he did it against two of the worst teams in the league, New Jersey and Anaheim.

Back on a line with Dany Heatley and Patrick Marleau, Thornton proved that a balanced attack doesn’t mean much if all of your lines are balanced in not producing. Two games with the his old-new linemates and San Jose’s offense is at full throttle once again.

Close Second: Chris Stewart, RW, Colorado Avalanche -- 3GP, 4G, 2A, 6 Points, +2

Defenseman of the Week
Duncan Keith, D, Chicago Blackhawks
3GP, 1G, 6A, 7 Points, +3

Keith had a huge three games for the Hawks, leading all players in scoring for that time period. The Winnipeg, Manitoba native’s first of the season was a game winner against the Minnesota Wild in a game where he was named the first star.


Goalie of the Week
Tim Thomas, G, Boston Bruins
2GP, 2W, 1.000 SV%, 0.00 GAA

Thomas wins Goalie of the Week honors twice in a row, thanks to not allowing a goal in either of his two starts.

Thomas’s production of late has him in the early MVP talks and might be able to push the Bruins back towards the top of the Eastern Conference, a place they held for much of the 2008-2009 season.


Tweet of the Week
@GaetanoTFP - As the name suggests The Fourth Period’s own Gaetano Colacci:

"The NHL’s slogan this year is questions will be answered. Answer this – When will the #NHL find good refs.”


MVP Watch
1. Steven Stamkos, C, Tampa Bay Lightning
Until Stamkos stops scoring at a two-point per-game clip and the Lightning stops winning games, he will continue to hold the top spot in the MVP Watch pretty securely.

2. Tim Thomas, G, Boston Bruins
Season line: 6GP, 6W, .984 SV%, 0.50 GAA. 3 SO, 1 awesome bucket.

3. Patrick Sharp, C/RW, Chicago Blackhawks
Sharp leads the NHL with 10 goals and three game winners; you don’t get much more valuable than that. Sharp broke out in the playoffs last year scoring at a point-a-game pace; this year he is already at 15 points in 12 games. The loss of Marian Hossa to injury may hurt his numbers, but it may also allow him to prove just how valuable to this under-performing Blackhawk team he really is.

4. Chris Stewart, RW, Colorado Avalanche
Stewart has put up great numbers so far this year, moving himself into second behind Steven Stamkos in the Art Ross race. With Craig Anderson out with an injury, more pressure will be put on the young winger and his fellow young Avs.

Michael Grossi is the Features Editor of The Fourth Period Magazine.
His columns [The G-Spot] appear every Monday on TFP.
Follow Michael Grossi on Twitter


 

 

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