October 27, 2008 Pinging Away TFP Columnist Dennis Bernstein shares some
interesting emails he's received over the last week.
[Los Angeles, CA] -- "President
Bush said for security reasons, he's sworn off all e-mail
communication. He will not be using email at the White House at all.
Is that a good idea? I mean, it's not like that speaking thing was
working out so good." – Tonight Show host Jay Leno
Some interesting emails floated into
my inbox over the past week, thought I'd share them with you:
Dear Dennis,
I'm bringing revolutionary coaching strategy to the hotbed of hockey.
My defensive scheme allowed slow footed enforcer George Parros a
breakaway and my goaltending strategy put in an ice cold goaltender
for a shootout. And it's only October!!
Regards,
Ron Wilson – Super Genius
Toronto
Hey man,
I'm not angry, I'm just thinking of a way to get out of my contract so
I can play for all that green in Russia.
No regards,
Avery in Dallas
Dear D. Bernstein,
See, a leopard CAN change its spots.
Sincerely,
T. Bertuzzi
The Prairies
DBern,
I hope they're keeping that seat warm for me on ESPN SportsCenter.
Needing help,
Barry Melrose
Lost somewhere in Tampa Bay
Dear Dennis,
Are we still in the league?
Pensively,
The Islanders
Nassau County, NY
Dennis,
Sometimes it's better to be lucky then good. Right place, right time,
fella.
Best,
Joel Quenneville
The Windy City
West Coast DB,
Don't worry, we'll get hot at the end of the season and make the
playoffs. We think.
Guessing,
The Flyers
Constantly renamed Wachovia Center
Dennis,
Can you please tell our fans that if they wait another three years,
we'll have a really good team?
Patiently,
Dean Lombardi
GM LA
Mr. Bernstein,
If I take the job in T.O. can I whack Ron Wilson as my first move?
Looking to get out the door,
Mr. Burke
Orange County, CA
Dennis B,
I'm trying everything possible to get an NHL team. If not Toronto,
maybe they'd want two teams in Montreal.
Technically,
Jim Balsillie
Blackberry Man
Dennis,
Whoever gets me is going to be happy. After all it's a CONTRACT YEAR.
Best,
M. Gaborik
Land of 10,000 lakes
Bernstein,
It's getting kinda boring over here, any suggestions?
Searching,
Sundin and Shanahan
Den,
My kind of town... Chicago is.
Happily,
N. Khabibulin
Not in Russia
DB,
Maybe I am worth $10 million a year after all.
Happily,
Thomas Vanek
Buffalo, NY
Honorable Dennis,
I may not know how to run the country, but I sure do know how to drop
a ceremonial face-off puck.
Respectfully,
Governor Sarah Palin
HERE AND THERE
While Steve Stamkos is struggling as mightily as his Tampa Bay team,
the 2nd pick in the 2008 draft isn't.
Drew Doughty looks as real a deal as an 18-year-old defenseman can be
while toiling for the rebuilding Kings. Doughty is an exceptional puck
mover with an accurate shot and isn't afraid to play the body either.
His recent effort in the Kings' 4-3 loss to the Avalanche was the bad
and the good; he got schooled by Ryan Smyth on a highlight reel goal
but made up for it by firing a laser past Peter Budaj to get the Kings
within one early in the third period.
Over the last couple of tilts, he's been paired with recent waiver
pickup from Detroit, Kyle Quincey and they've found chemistry. TFP's
main man, Dave Pagnotta gave us the heads up on Quincey, saying that
he has oodles of potential and there just wasn't a spot on the champ's
varsity for the 23-year-old. In his short tenure in LA, Kyle has shown
good decision making and an ability to move the puck too.
Back to Doughty, one member of the Kings' organization called him,
"the most talented rookie to enter the organization since Luc
Robitaille."
Dennis
Bernstein, the man behind SCORE! Media and an NHL
Analyst with ESPN Radio, is the Los Angeles
Correspondent for The Fourth Period Magazine and a Columnist
for TheFourthPeriod.com.
